A Variety of Thoughts About Everything

 In ancient Rome, during"Republican" days, before the Empire, Rome was often very divided. And it was, most decidedly, a Class division. And the two classes were known by names: 1) They were the Plebians, AKA the lower classes and/or Working class. Although you could be a very wealthy Merchant you were still a Plebian. 2) The Patricians. AKA the Nobility. Although you could be very poor, and lost your land minimum, and still be in the Patrician class, although without your membership in the Senate, by virtue of having been born into the correct families. Like the Gens Julii, or the Gens Cornelii, etc. And throughout the history of Republican Rome there was a series of greater and lesser conflicts between the classes. The Patricians had all the Political and Religious power and the Plebians wanted to have some Political and Religious power. I am convinced that the overthrow of the last King of Rome was the Patricians getting rid of a check on their power as the Kings, always F...

 When I was born my family, while not classically poor, would be classified as that. Everything  got stretched and there was never quite enough of anything. Thru a series of things we all got older. And when I was 14 thru 16 my Mum shipped me off to relatives several times. I was a "troubled" kid. What was really going on was I was starting to grow into a man and the fight between my step father and I was coming. And it was going to be nasty and bloody with, quite possibly, death being involved. The last time this happened I was 16 years old and it was the beginning of February 1980. She sent me to my father who lived outside of Toronto Ontario. Five years before, when my older brother was 16, she had shipped him off to our father and things had worked out well. My brother had a good experience and some good things happened. The situation was very different five years later, in February of 1980, when I went up there. After 10 or 11 days on a very cold February night my Father...

I grew up knowing that my Grandmother and Great Aunt, sisters, had been reporters for Time-Life from about 1940 onward thru World War II. They had a few fantastic stories about that time. My Great Aunt became an accomplished Author and my Grandmother produced some, not really well recieved, Science Fiction.  And when I was a child we would watch the Evening News on Television. And the most trusted person in news at that time was the CBS News Anchor Walter Conkrite. When he signed off at the end of the program with his "And that's the way it is on DAY OF WEEK and Date" you knew that he had given you the news of the day as clearly and succinctly as was known to him and without any of himself mixed in. He told you what the news was. He did not tell what to think of the news. He did have opinions. And, to the best of my knowledge, he only expressed them a few times and clearly labeled them as His Opinion. And, at that time, the American News Media all followed that formula. T...

 In America, or any Hyper Capitalist country, we are taught that if we do not "Contribute" then we are worthless. A drain on society. And by "Contribute" what they mean is spend your life working for a company that pays you as little as possible for your job and gives as little, if any, benefits as it can get away wth. You are always at the mercy of your Boss. That is "Contributing". So we go through our lives trying to "contribute" to the best of our abilities. And society just keeps placing more and more burdons upon us. As they relieve the Rich of the need to pay taxes they keep putting the burdon of survival of us all more and more on the Middle and Working Class. Which are, in reality, the same thing. What happens is, for many of us, our Mental Health, or Spiritual Condition, whichever you prefer, becomes tied to our Financial Condition. If our Financial Condition takes a hit, if we become "Non Contributors", then depression and ot...

 At the end of the First World War, AKA "The War to End All Wars", there was a huge backlash throughout the world Especially in Europe in Germany and Italy. Japan was already on it's Imperial Expansonism so I do not consider them a Backlash or Reaction. Their course was already set. In Italy there was a fear, based in some reality, that the nation was not really going to get any of the benefits of being on the "winning" side of the war. And the economy was already hurting and showing no signs of improving. In Germany they were taking the entire blame for WW1. Everybody knew that every single European power shared the blame for that war and the "winning" side made Germany shoulder all of it. And they Militarily and Financially crippled Germany for the forseeable future. France began a period of political instability, changes in Government on a regular and ongoing basis, and fear based holding onto everything that had not worked in the past that was hidd...

 I have never felt like I quite fit in anywhere or any time in my life. I was always, it seemed, the outsider looking in, longing to be in there, and never quite knowing how to be. I also discovered, at a very young age, that I look at things differently than the rest of the human race. Not better. Not worse. Just differently. So here I am, having no real connection to te rest of the human race, deeply wishing for one, having no idea how to accomplish this thing, and twisting myself up in so many different ways trying to BE someone else. And that someone else would change from one moment to the next depending on who I was hanging around with at the time. I became a total chamelion just trying to fit in with no idea of who I am. No connection to the SELF that is me. And my "life" went on. I continued trying to be human and failing. Continued trying to be connected to others and failing. Continued trying to be a part of and continued being apart from. Not a good way to experien...

“Standing on a darkling plain Shivering on a cold winters night Watching the stars twinkle above me Filled with sadness Deep and Bright” Kevin G. Farrell 1985 or 86 When I wrote that, it seems like a million years ago, I had just broken up with my first attempt at an adult romantic relationship. It was not purty and we should have never been together. It was a totally disfunctional and hurt filled attempt by two very wounded people. And yet, my feelings were real. I had no idea how to quantify them, or identify them, and no tools to try to deal with them, and this writing above came out of it. That was real. And so I kept stumbling thru life. Trying to be human and having no idea how to do this. Every once in a while a thing would happen and I would try to write about it. And would fail miserably. I am related to some writers. My Great Grandfather on my Mothers side was a preacher. He wrote sermons all the time. My Great Aunt on my Mothers side is an accomplished writer who started...